summer lovin...

Ooo wee!! It's been ages since i updated this mutha!

I've been crazy busy with work and travel and just...plain sloth. I rock at being lazy, not to toot my own horn.

Anywhoooo, here's a bit of an update on what's been goin on.

June: went to boston and new york for vacation. saw some friends who moved to boston in september/october and saw the in-laws in nyc. highlites:

• cannoli in little italy in boston. holy CRAP, where have you been all my life???
• the tyler perry, steve perry, perry ferrell, no... the SHEPARD FAIREY exhibit in boston . AWESOME
• Lunch at Sportello in boston. wtf. too damn good. still dreaming of that pasta dish i had.
• the richard avedon exibit in nyc. stunning. makes me want to be reincarnated as a gorgeous model in paris in 1955.
• rice freakin pudding at rice to riches in Soho. holy SHIT!! i could eat my weight in the mascarpone rice pudding. we have a similar rice pudding place here in pdx, but it's like bullshit compared to R2R!!! Granted, they were out of mascarpone when i went, but still... (p.s. kelly ripa apparently lives nearby R2R and loves it! must puke it up later cuz that fool is TINY)
• frank lloyd wright exibit at the guggenheim. just a beautiful, beautiful building with lots of fun models of his buildings to look at. very cool.
• my new (free!!) converse tennies from our friends in boston--i love converse! who knew?!?!?
• ice cream at Toscanini's in boston. homemade deliciousness. coulda gone there every night!!
• the high line in nyc. such a cool idea and a lovely walk. really nice. wish my feet hadn't been dying--too much time in ill-fitting sandals. shoulda stayed in the converse tennies...

Ok, clearly there's a common thread to my highlights....food and art. But mostly food. That's mostly what i love and what i remember from trips!

THEN, after boston and nyc, i went down to washington d.c. for a work conference. it was good, but hard to shift back into work mode after a week away. not many highlites, the conference went until 5 each day and most museums close around that time. SO... my hilites are limited to:

• sweetgreen in d.c. i loved me some red mango in portland, but it's gone now (damn you economy!!!). sweetgreen is similar: plain frozen yogurt (tart and YUMMY) with mixins like mangos and strawberries (holla!!). plus, they sell salads (whatever, bring on the froyo!) found a place in pdx that's similar PLUS, trader joe's sells frozen nonfat plain yogurt so i can add my own mixins at home! cah-RAP, i better start bustin out the muumuus and elastic waist pants NOW!
• H&M. they're in seattle and san francisco, so i reckon portland will get one someday. in the meantime, i have to either settle for forever 21 or pack in all my cheap/foreign made garment shopping when i get to go to d.c. for work. good thing a colleague is just as in love with h&m as i am. however, with vastly different results. her: loaded and tiny so she spends about $300 on size 4 stuff. me: poor and giant (see above for love of food) so i bought a few things under $20 (my absolute limit for cheap-ass clothes).
• my new fancy coach bag i bought in d.c.!! it was SUCH a deal, i couldn't resist! $25!! yes, i bought it on the street from a woman wearing a burka, but STILL! i had wanted to buy a rolex on the street in nyc, but didn't find any. street-coach is AWESOMER!

Since coming home i've had a ridonkulous cold and many many visits to our head start centers around the state. tons of meetings and reams of paper printed, collated and stapled. mentally exhausting.

HOWEVER, for my bday we went to the coast for an overnight trip. VERY cute little b&b type place (yes, we stayed in the 'glory suite'--ewwww, sounds porny) with views of the bay and a hot tub with a skylite. must. get. hottub. for. house. STAT! so relaxing. so nice to just sit there and soak and look at water and stars. sigh....plus, i was a little tipsy. even nicer.

i'll update with more information on how, despite the lovely june and july I'VE had, it's been a horrendous spring/summer for the people i know and love. for now, let me end on a high note...

there's a place in portland that sells kolaches. apparently they're so dang good, they SOLD OUT today. whatever, i'll be there first thing monday morning!! cue the elephant noise when i walk!

babies are REALLY interesting

So, i've found a new blog that i love. I read it most days (granted, not as faithfully as Awkwardfamilyphotos.com of course!!) and am loving the stuff about early childhood development.

http://scienceblogs.com/cognitivedaily/2009/06/six-month-olds_prefer_differen.php#more


interesting!

feelin not so low...

Ooooooo Kay! so, i'm not quite as sullen and crap as I was in my last post.
HOWEVER....now my 'what's it all about' mental-wrestling has evolved.

Even if i DO have kids, what are the odds that they or their children will give a rat's ass about my "I love Reese's" scrapbook page??? aren't they (or their bitch-wives) gonna just throw that crap out?

I am now afraid of having my pictures and/or scrapbooks wind up at a sad, ghetto Goodwill. How embarrassing!! The worst would be that they end up on something like Awkward Family Photos.com (my most favorite website ever, thanks SARA!!). My poor Beso scrapbook where she's wearing hats and sitting in the fridge...all exposed to the scrutiny of wise-ass kids?? SAD!

Ok. There are things that need to be decided prior to one's death:

1) who is going to know where to go in order to remove the "adult" items from the house so my poor mother/father don't find them?
2) who is going to take and burn the scrapbooks before they fall into the hands of some emo dude who finds scrapbooking 'ironic'?
3) who's going to delete all my twitter/facebook postings and/or blog entries?

at least now i have a PLAN! :)))

feelin low....

(this is, admittedly, a pathetic and pity-party-post. sorry!! it'll pass, but i thought i'd share for a moment)

So after another visit from FRED, I suddenly had a realization this morning as i was brushing my teeth while reading a scrapbooking magazine....WTF am i scrapping for?? I guess in the back of my mind i always figured someone would be interested in seeing my stupid scrapbook pages...and i guess i always assumed that would be someone related to me (as in, a kid)... But what if i don't ever have kids? who are these scrapbooks for?!?!? who's going to give a crap about that one time we went to vancouver for 4th of july? me? in my senility?? i reckon that's what i need to remember. i'm doing it for myself. it's just weird how these sad feelings of 'who really cares' pop up every now and then. about 98% of the time i feel very happy with my life and how it's going. just...once in a while i feel like i'm living my life in a holding pattern...like i'm waiting for the next big thing to come....but....this might be it...and 98% of the time, that's totally great! just....when i look at the stuff i need to scrapbook i wonder....who (besides me) will ever care?!?!?

if i had some lime, i'd make me a gin and tonic....

off to scrap some more.....sigh...

Beautiful Weekend

OMG, we had the world's most perfect weather this weekend. Low 70s, cool breeze, flowers blooming, sun shining, mountains glowing with winter snow....just glorious. Makes me happy to be alive. Ahhhhh..... Sadly, no pictures to document the beauty. Just take my word for it.

Saturday we ran errands after having a picnic at the rose garden. Did i mention the weather was perfect?!?! The roses weren't really blooming yet, but it's still such a beautiful place.
As luck would have it, my perfect picnic was marred by a damn squirrel.

After a squirrel had the NERVE to climb up the back of my leg to get to my cookie (the baked good in my hand, not my...you know, "cookie") in college i've had a massive thing against f-ing squirrels. Anyhoo, we were sitting in the shady picnic area with a beautiful view of downtown and Mount Hood in the background, enjoying our sandwiches and stuff. I'd pointed out the big, fat squirrel earlier, "is it pregnant?" "how embarrassing if it's not pregnant and we think it is", etc. So, I'm gazing at the view, enjoying the breezes and I hear James say "WHOA! Look at that!" I look to my left and to my right, but don't see anything weird. THEN, I look straight ahead. Right there not 18 inches away from me is THE DAMN SQUIRREL sitting right on the picnic table staring straight at me with its little beady pregnant eyes. EWWW! It took a second or 2 for me to process what I was looking at, then I let out the most girlish, cartoon-y hoot/scream and began kicking my feet and throwing my hands all around. The damn thing just SAT there until finally it saw James wave his arm. I was totally creeped out. Honestly, my voice was ridiculously girly: like the lady in the Tom and Jerry cartoons when she sees Jerry and hops on the chair and screams. So embarrassing. I'm a grown-assed woman afraid of a damn SQUIRREL!!! Stupid.

The rest of the day was WAY better, with the exception of seeing "Terminator Salvation". I was so hyped (love me some Christian Bale and stupid explosions)!! It was such a disappointment! So much potential. Sigh.

At least So You Think You Can Dance is back on.

OH!! I never watch those horrible Jon and Kate people but was terribly curious to see how they'd handle the cheating allegations, etc. this season. It was really bad. Like watching a divorce slowly unfold. I felt dirty. Can't say I won't watch again, though.

How was YOUR weekend???

father cutie!

OMG! I vaguely heard something about the Catholic priest who'd been caught having an affair... with a woman (phew!!! what a relief!), but didn't really get into the story much. Like many modern-day Catholics who feel like the Church needs to revamp some of the more...restrictive positions (birth control! homosexuality! priests' celibacy! etc!), I figured, "oh, poor dear. he should be able to have a romantic relationship AND continue to perform his role as a priest" blahblahblah. Didn't really give it much thought.

WELL. FINALLY, I saw a picture of the dude.

HOLY CRAP!!!

This guy is H.O.T. Not just attractive or handsome, but HOOOOOOTTTT!!!!

AND his name is Father Cutie??? Too adorable. Granted, you don't pronounce it that way, but come on. CUTIE?!?!?! Too much.

I think I'm in love. Let's move on this whole letting priests have "relationships" already. I'm first in line, yo!

actor's studio questionnaire

1. What is your favorite word? chocolatey
2. What is your least favorite word? ****roach
3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally? Eww. I reckon 'sincerity'
4. What turns you off? narcissism
5. What is your favorite curse word? f**k
6. What sound or noise do you love? the ocean
7. What sound or noise do you hate? shopping cart on asphalt
8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt? soap opera actress
9. What profession would you not like to do? anything in finance/accounting/budgets/related to $$
10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates? you're home

Your turn! If those asshole actors can do it, so can we!

There once was a very crooked girl

OMG. Talk about the dumbest injury!

Evidently, I have the world’s strongest neck muscles. Strong enough to torque my neck to such a degree, I’m walking around with my ear on my right shoulder like a dog listening to a confusing sound. I woke up early for an 8am meeting at work (ugghhh!!!), did a little stretch as I got out of bed and simultaneously heard a pop and felt a shooting pain down the left side of my neck. Every movement hurt like the dickens. I was convinced I’d ruptured my jugular vein and was about to die of massive internal bleeding….so I showered really fast. I called my doctor and was ready and waiting in her office as they opened at 8am. She wanted me to get some xrays (SEE?!?!? I knew it was serious!!) and take some muscle relaxants (oh yes, PLEASE!) and not go in to work.

I called work to let them know I wouldn’t be in (oops, had to miss my day-long meeting. What a chame.), took my medicine and slept for 4 hours. I woke up, called my doctor to see what horrible thing I’d done to my vertebrae (nothing, it’s just a muscle spasm), took another pill and slept for another 4 hours.

THE PAIN, y’all, the PAIN! I was tempted to self-medicate with some leftover oxycotin, but decided Advil was smarter and less habit-forming. Now, 2 days later, the pain is less intense, but moving down my neck to my shoulders. I’m sure it’s all because of my desk job. Sitting hunched over for hours at a time can’t be good.

It all comes back to my ultra-strong neck muscles. I had no idea how dangerous they were—to be able to stretch out and strain itself. WOW! Shoulda guessed, though. Every time I do crunches or ab exercises at the gym, my NECK is what’s sore the next day. Clearly I’m doing something wrong if my neck is getting the massive workout meant for my gut! Just don’t mess with my neck or else it’ll kick your ASS!!!

Death and Taxes

Sorry, this is neither fun nor funny...and a bit of a downer. :(

The last week or so has been one so full of emotions, it’s difficult to entirely sort through it all.

Last week began with my being at the airport by 7am (y’all know how I hate to get up early!) for an 8am flight to southern Oregon. 1.5 grande lattes later, I was at work (I spilled ½ my grande latte all over the rental car—ARRGGHH). Much rushing, observing, reviewing, etc. Southern Oregon is beautiful. Not as green as Portland, but striking in its own way. The weather was cold, but not unbearable.

We got to stay at the most delightfully charming historic hotel downtown. Their whole theme is ‘birds’, so the “do not disturb” doorhangers have a little birdie in a nest and it says “Nesting”. AWWWW. Cute!

Later in the week I drove to another town in southern Oregon—through a beautiful and scenic pass. Ice-covered lakes, snow-dusted evergreens…beautiful. However, I had to be sure I watched my speed. The last time I drove through this pass I got a ticket. Driving and singing to ABBA was just too fun.

Again, more hurried work. On Wednesday afternoon on the way to visit one of our centers, my husband called to tell me his mother had indeed been diagnosed with ALS. This had been a remote possibility, but it was still a shock to hear. Suddenly I fast-forwarded to a time when she could be in a wheelchair, unable to speak or eat on her own. I couldn’t quite imagine it—she’s one of the most physically fit and athletic people you’ll ever meet. I could hear the anger in James’ voice, as well as his frustration. Why her? How her? Everything in her adult life has been with a focus on health and fitness. It doesn’t make sense.

The sadness was all-consuming…until I went to observe in our classrooms. I’m sorry, but babies and toddlers (and preschoolers!) need to be prescribed by doctors to people suffering with depression. Seeing those little babies crawl and laugh and dance and sing…you can’t help but smile and feel happy!

When I returned to Portland, I was prepared to do my research on ALS and see what I could do to support my mother-in-law, her husband, and of course, James. These guys are not used to seeing Diane in need of anything or anyone. She’s the rock and the strongest person you’ll ever meet.

Sadly, as I dressed for work on Friday, I got even more bad news. My boss called and said, “Oh, Clarissa. I just don’t know how to tell you this, so I’ll just tell you.” I thought for sure I was being laid off. These things tend to be announced on Fridays. Then, she said, “My son passed away.” (on 4/15--TAX DAY!!) I was in shock. Her son was 28, a father of a 3 year-old son, married, and had just gone through surgery to improve his respiratory ailments he’d been fighting for years since going to the army. I’m not graceful, nor do I have the tact or ability to say the right thing. I was speechless. What does one say to a mother who has just lost her son? I had no clue what she must be going through. My heart just broke for her.

The rest of the day (and weekend) I was numb. A heavy weight just dropped and stuck in my stomach. I slept a lot and stayed in my jammies a lot. Saturday night I didn’t fall asleep until about 6:30am. My mind just would not stop. I felt terrible for these people in my life that were going through such pain, but I also felt guilty for feeling so miserable, when in actuality this has nothing to do with me. Neurotic? Yep, that’s me.

Monday at work I was still feeling completely useless. We learned that my boss’ son’s funeral was that afternoon. Though we were not prepared and weren’t wearing appropriate “mourning” clothes, a few of us from the office went to pay our respects. I dreaded seeing my boss. I managed to keep it together when she approached our little group—she was visibly thinner, dressed head to toe in black and wearing big, black sunglasses. She joked she was “doing the Jackie O thing” and hiding behind her glasses. Who could blame her?! The ceremony was lovely, but left me feeling completely worn out. I went home and slept for 4 hours.

Part of life, of course, is the tragic. We will face our own and/or loved one’s aging process, sickness and death. The continuum we’re all on is predictable: you and your friends all start getting “real jobs”, you and your friends all start getting married, you and your friends all start having kids, you and your friends start dealing with parents’ illness/aging, you and your friends start losing people close to you, you and your friends start dying. Unavoidable, but distressing nonetheless.

Here’s hoping the rest of April brings peace and strength to those who need it most.

Position available!

For several months now, the Martinez-Owen household has been trying to add to its ranks. We’re looking to add a permanent member of the team.

He or she must be able to (with training):
-Follow verbal and written instructions, as well as visual and oral cues
-Use power and hand tools
-Perform various task throughout the day (ranging from adorable to annoying)
-Drive company vehicles and machinery to and from various job sites (most likely bumping into company property along the way)
-Assist staff with various construction/demolition projects

Minimum Educational Requirements:
-High School Diploma GED (Bachelor degree preferred)
-Bilingual (Spanish/English)

Job Requirements:
-Ability to lift up to and maneuver 50 plus pounds (within 18 year timeline)
-Work out-of-doors for extended periods under unfavorable conditions (typical of Oregon for 9 months of the year)

Preferred skills and knowledge(training opportunities available):
-Use and operate indoor sewage-removal system
-Operate construction equipment in various media (paints, clay, sand, water, etc)

Pre-employment health screening is required
..........................................

Not asking too much, right? Well, despite our best efforts, we have yet to recruit such a candidate. Every few weeks we check our “inbox” (ahem) and receive notice from Aunt Flo that there are no new applicants.

Just last month, our recruitment efforts hit a bit of a snag. Team Martinez-Owen was separated by several time zones during the peak “recruiting season”. I found myself so aroused by the possibility of bringing on a new member, that I was tempted to do some outside recruitment consultation (head-hunting?) with various waiters, restaurant patrons, strangers on the street...among many others. So strong was my desire to fill the position! Thankfully, I was able to get home to coordinate with my partner and we were able to do some collaboration on hiring together! Self-recruitment just doesn’t cut it sometimes. For this type of project, it’s all about teamwork.

Despite our inability to fill the position thus far, we are prepared to wait for the “right” candidate, even if it takes time. Regardless of our expansion project, we remain optimistic about the outlook for team M.O. If necessary, we can continue with the staff we have on-hand and train for additional skills. Our capable Beso-of-all-trades has even taken it upon herself to approximate an entry-level candidate by relieving herself on the kitchen floor. With this kind of attention to detail in preparing us for hazardous waste removal, we feel we can continue without a new member of the team for some time! Thanks, Beso! A valued member of Team M.O.!

We hope to have another exciting recruitment effort soon, so we are very excited about the opportunities to work hard on our collaborative efforts!

Thank you for your continued support and interest in Team M.O. and in our growth-efforts! We couldn’t do it without you… hmm. actually, that’s a little weird. ;)

Ha!

another FB list!

So apparently The Big Read said that, at some point, on average, adults have only read six books on this list. So ... copy this list, remove my yes and no answers, and add your own in a note. Tag your friends, and me!

1 Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen - no
2 The Lord of the Rings - JRR Tolkien -HAIL no
3 Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte - nope
4 Harry Potter series - JK Rowling - yes
5 To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee - yes my FAVE
6 The Bible – bits
7 Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte - 1/2
8 1984 - George Orwell -no
9 His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman - no
10 Great Expectations - Charles Dickens - no
11 Little Women - Louisa M Alcott - 1/2
12 Tess of the D'Urbervilles - Thomas Hardy –– no
13 Catch 22 - Joseph Heller –– no
14 Complete Works of Shakespeare - parts
15 Rebecca - Daphne Du Maurier - no
16 The Hobbit - JRR Tolkien - no
17 Birdsong - Sebastian Faulks - no
18 Catcher in the Rye - JD Salinger - yes
19 The Time Traveller's Wife - Audrey Niffenegger -no
20 Middlemarch - George Eliot- No
21 Gone With The Wind - Margaret Mitchell - no
22 The Great Gatsby - F Scott Fitzgerald - no
23 Bleak House - Charles Dickens- no
24 War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy - no
25 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams - NO
26 Brideshead Revisited - Evelyn Waugh - no
27 Crime and Punishment - Fyodor Dostoyevsky - NO
28 Grapes of Wrath - John Steinbeck - does the movie count!??
29 Alice in Wonderland - Lewis Carroll - no, but you did, Steph!
30 The Wind in the Willows - Kenneth Grahame - no
31 Anna Karenina - Leo Tolstoy - yes
32 David Copperfield - Charles Dickens - no
33 The Chronicles of Narnia - CS Lewis - some
34 Emma - Jane Austen - no (again, doesn't the movie count?!?!)
35 Persuasion - Jane Austen - no
36 The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe - yes
37 The Kite Runner - Khaled Hosseini - yes
38 Captain Corelli's Mandolin - Louis De Bernieres- yes (sara this was your pick, right?)
39 Memoirs of a Geisha - Arthur Golden - yes
40 Winnie the Pooh - AA Milne -no
41 Animal Farm - George Orwell - yes
42 The Da Vinci Code - Dan Brown - yes
43 One Hundred Years of Solitude - Gabriel Garcia Marquez - yes
44 A Prayer for Owen Meaney - John Irving - no
45 The Woman in White - Wilkie Collins - no
46 Anne of Green Gables - LM Montgomery - yes
47 Far From The Madding Crowd - Thomas Hardy - no
48 The Handmaid's Tale - Margaret Atwood - no, but i've been close
49 Lord of the Flies - William Golding - yes
50 Atonement - Ian McEwan - yes
51 Life of Pi - Yann Martel - yes
52 Dune - Frank Herbert-no
53 Cold Comfort Farm - Stella Gibbons - no
54 Sense and Sensibility - Jane Austen - no
55 A Suitable Boy - Vikram Seth - no
56 The Shadow of the Wind - Carlos Ruiz Zafon - no
57 A Tale Of Two Cities - Charles Dickens - no
58 Brave New World - Aldous Huxley - yes
59 The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time - Mark Haddon - yes
60 Love In The Time Of Cholera - Gabriel Garcia Marquez - yes
61 Of Mice and Men - John Steinbeck - yes
62 Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov - no
63 The Secret History - Donna Tartt - yes (thanks to sara's recommendation)
64 The Lovely Bones - Alice Sebold - yes
65 Count of Monte Cristo - Alexandre Dumas - no
66 On The Road - Jack Kerouac - no
67 Jude the Obscure - Thomas Hardy -no
68 Bridget Jones's Diary - Helen Fielding - yes
69 Midnight's Children - Salman Rushdie - no
70 Moby Dick - Herman Melville - part (i even tried with cliff notes to understand it...but got tired)
71 Oliver Twist - Charles Dickens - no
72 Dracula - Bram Stoker - no
73 The Secret Garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett - no
74 Notes From A Small Island - Bill Bryson - yes
75 Ulysses - James Joyce - no
76 The Bell Jar - Sylvia Plath - yes
77 Swallows and Amazons - Arthur Ransome - no
78 Germinal - Emile Zola - no
79 Vanity Fair - William Makepeace Thackeray - no
80 Possession - AS Byatt- no
81 A Christmas Carol - Charles Dickens - yes
82 Cloud Atlas - David Mitchell - no
83 The Color Purple - Alice Walker - yes
84 The Remains of the Day - Kazuo Ishiguro - no
85 Madame Bovary - Gustave Flaubert - no
86 A Fine Balance - Rohinton Mistry - no
87 Charlotte's Web - EB White - yes
88 The Five People You Meet In Heaven - Mitch Albom - no
89 Adventures of Sherlock Holmes - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle - no
90 The Faraway Tree Collection - Enid Blyton - no
91 Heart of Darkness - Joseph Conrad - yes
92 The Little Prince - Antoine De Saint-Exupe - no
93 The Wasp Factory - Iain Banks - no
94 Watership Down - Richard Adams - no
95 A Confederacy of Dunces - John Kennedy Toole - yes
96 A Town Like Alice - Nevil Shute - no
97 The Three Musketeers - Alexandre Dumas - no
98 Hamlet –– Shakespeare –– i don't think so
99 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - Roald Dahl - yes
100 Les Miserables - Victor Hugo - no

¡que linda!

So, I'm not the religious follower of Linda of All & Sundry like Sara, but when I do read it, i love it. That being said, she cryptically 'tweeted' that apparently she was tacky, was lucky to just have a man, her husband was annoyed and that she needed a new blog topic stat. well THAT got me curious.

I beg you to please read.

This is great because I've been feeling this way lately too. I know older women say what they hate most is becoming 'invisible' in the world. Nobody seems to care what ladies with grey hair have to say. For those of us in the middle (not quite the young chippy and not the old grey-hair), Linda's post makes a lot of sense. I never set the world on fire with my looks, but on OCCASION I'd notice a glance. Now?? Never...unless it's someone who's clearly crazy.

For example...there was the one time when I went to a skating rink up here in Portland (i hadn't skated in 20 years or so and thought it'd be fun). I was totally hit-on by a dude who skated past me, bumping my arm and shoving a smiley face keychain into my hand. HOT. He later asked me to skate with him during 'couples skate'. HOOOOOT. Poor dear looked to be in his early 30s and was clearly the king of the skating rink.

Anyhoo....with Linda's post in my head I went to the gym the other night. As I was doubled over the stretching contraption, i turned to my right and noticed a young hot dude checking me out. I thought, 'wow! this is great! i still got it goin ON! he must really be turned on by my stomach roll and visible granny-panty line.' then i turned to my left and saw 2 girls on the mats stretching each other out. they were doing that move where you sit with your legs out in a V, feet touching, grab hands and pull/lean to stretch out your inner thighs. i turned back to my right to look at the dude and sure enough it was the semi-lesbian-stretching he'd been looking at. OF COURSE! Oh well....

fuzzy slideshow

ok, how much do i love my "fuzzy" keyword slideshow?!?!? it's the #1 word that comes to mind when i think of my beloved kitty, Beso, so i thought it would be fun to see what Flickr images come up. Granted there are lots of kitties, hamsters, and sweaters...but there are also PEOPLE. like a chick that looks like my friend carmen, a clearly gay couple, and a 80s picture of a bunch of ladies hanging around a kitchen. Weird! love it! sometimes i just sit and watch the images go by and wonder...fuzzy? how??

i'm easily amused.

another FB questionnaire

Rather than do this of FB (where people may see it), I'll hide my answers here. :)

1. Who was your FIRST prom date? Ralph

2. Do you still talk to your FIRST love? No.

3. What was your 1st alcoholic drink? Besides sips of my dad's beer, probably a wine cooler.

4. What was your FIRST job? Montgomery Ward...hot.

5. What was your FIRST car? 1976 volvo (eventually the front end was 1978 and the rear was 1976)

6. Who was the FIRST person to text you today? I haven't gotten any texts today - I don't get very many :(

7. Who is the FIRST person you thought of this morning? james. his alarm was trying to wake me up

8. Who was your FIRST grade teacher? no clue, but i liked her.

9. Where did you go on your FIRST ride on an airplane? Montgomery Alabama to visit aunt cleo and uncle jack and their scary-ass poodle, Nit Noi

10. Who was your FIRST best friend & do you still talk? (as a little, little girl) kari moore and andrea best--kari passed away, but andrea Yes (on FB)

11. Where was your FIRST sleep over? Kari and/or Andrea

12. Who was the FIRST person you talked to today? james

13. Whose wedding were you in the FIRST time? no clue--i was the go-to flower girl in our family for a few years

14. What was the FIRST thing you did this morning? cuddled the kitty

15. What was the FIRST concert you ever went to? besides rodeo concerts at the astrodome/san antonio, billy joel

16. FIRST tattoo? hook em

17. First piercing? My ears as a baby. SO mezican.

18. First foreign country you've been to? mexico, duh. almost mandatory if you live in south texas

19. FIRST movie you remember seeing? there were so many....maybe the biggest one i remember was Grease.

21. What was the first state you lived in? Texas

22. Who was your FIRST roommate? Steph!

23. If you had one wish. What would it be? Unlimited wishes, duh.

24. What is something you would learn if you had the chance? to love exercise. impossible, i know.

25. Who do you think will be the next person to post this? On FB? no clue

bjork

after watching saturday night live where they made fun of bjork, james showed me this little gem on youtube.



she's complete nutter and should have probably been hospitalized a long time ago, but she's so dang cute, you can't look away!

stupid FB questions

Some of my "friends" have been doing this on FB and their answers have really gotten me (and steph--i think) revisiting our recollection of the past. Here ya go...


SENIOR YEAR...

1. Did you date someone from your school?
Yes--ralph

2. Did you marry someone from your high school?
no

3. Did you car pool to school?
Ok. My memory says yes: Steph and I would take turns driving to school....and picking up Patty (which apparently never happened according to her) and Michelle F (which neither of us remember).

4. What kind of car did you have?
banged up old volvo

5. What kind of car do you have now?
banged up old civic

6. Its Saturday night...where are you now?
i was watching slumdog millionaire (this time with the husband and some friends)

7. Its Saturday night...where were you then?
sitting at home or driving around (steph remember when we got pulled over for reckless driving on SPID/xpressway?? that was weird), or bowling, or something else nerd.

8. What kind of job did you have in high school?
none

9. What kind of job do you do now?
education specialist (i'm awesome)

10. Were you a party animal?
too nerdy--ok, and patty says she was at all kinds of parties?? WHEN?! she was bummin rides off of us to do nothing.

11. Were you considered a flirt?
Heck if I know. I’ve been told that I was heavily lusted after, but I think that was just nature.--says michelle f. (shuddering)

12. Were you in band, orchestra, or choir?
Band, duh.

13. Were you a nerd?
Ummm…yes and no. I didn’t study enough to be a true nerd, but I was smart enough to be considered one.--says michelle. this is awesome.

14. Did you get suspended or expelled?
whatever.

15. Can you sing the fight song?
i think so! hail to our high school, honor to thy name....blah blah...GREGORY PORTLAND HIGH!

16. Who was/were your favorite teacher(s)
mr salinas--i felt bad for him; i ate crunch bars and slept (with a tiny pillow!!) in his class. good old days.

17. Where did you sit during lunch?
band hall

18. What was your school's full name?
Gregory-Portland High School

19. When did you graduate?
1990

20. What was your school mascot?
Wildcat

21. If you could go back and do it again, would you?
good lord no.

22. Did you have fun at Prom?
I didn't go to my senior prom. I wasn’t going to go without a date and my bf was on a JETS competition trip.--says michelle. WTF is JETS??
I say: yeah, i went with ralph, who was in college by then--i wonder if that was weird for him? i thought i was a badass.

23. Do you still talk to the person you went to Prom with?
not in about 10 years. sad...

24. Are you planning on going to your next reunion?
AW HAAAAAIIIIIILLLLL no. unless you wanna go, steph. ;)

25. Do you still talk to your friends from high school?
just the one that really matters. MISS YOU, STEPH!!!

fair weather UNfriend

we've had gorgeous weather lately. stunningly clear. bright and shiny. mountain views everyday. decent temps (above 35). TOTALLY uncharacteristic. it mocks me. it reminds me how little i do outdoors. part of the beauty of living here is being able to say, "oh, i can't [insert outdoor activity here], it's too nasty outside". Without that excuse, i'm forced to face the truth...i'd almost always rather be inside than out. Sick, I know.

Even my vitamin D levels reflect my shut-in tendancy. My doctor has me taking supplements....or I could get more sunshine. Sadly, we're so dang north that even if I were to lay out in the beautiful sunshine, I wouldn't get what I need. I asked him to prescribe me a beach vacation, but he missed my attempt at humor and reminded me of the hazards of sunburns and skin cancer.

Do I have to move to North Dakota to avoid outdoor activity temptations? It's bad enough that the summers are so freakin beautiful here. Makes you feel so bad that you're not out hiking or climbing something.

On an unrelated tip: Anyone wanna meet me in Florida March 25ish?!?!? I wanna go to Disneyworld and can't convince my poop of a husband to go!

Quick x2: Week of 1/26-2/1

*Slow and lazy. That’s me. Went to the gym once all week. Napped through the rest of the week (or as Perez Hilton says, “weak”).

*I traveled for work, which was nice. I got to stay in a beautiful historic hotel in Ashland—www.ashlandsprings.com. Totally charming, small room facing the mountains. A-freakin-dorable! Too bad the sidewalks roll up at 5pm, I couldn’t get to visit any of the equally adorable shops in town. At least I wasn’t tempted to shop!

*I’m reading another Anne Lamott book—she’s so good and funny and touching. If you haven’t read any of her books and consider yourself a Christian, you must check her out. Her thoughts on faith are so approachable and realistic. Not holier-than-thou in the LEAST. Very real. If you don't consider yourself a Christian, reading her might convince you that not all Christians and preachy and self-righteous.

*I’m so dang forgetful. Is it me or is it early Alzheimers??? I made it to the airport for my trip to Ashland to find I’d left all my very important stuff at home. I had to rebuy toiletries; find a decent book (the Anne Lamott); run without my ipod (truly unholy), and read my new book without my reading glasses (thankfully the wine I had at dinner eased the eye strain). Once I got home I missed the parking shelter because I was busy checking status updates on FB—ok, not Alzheimer’s fault, but still silly. Felt like an ass when the parking patrol guy came up and asked if I needed anything. He probably saw me shuffling around with my bag for ½ hour and thought to investigate.

*OMG. I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE Battlestar Galactica! It sounds incredibly nerd, but it’s actually really, really good. Between BSG and Friday Night Lights, my Friday evenings are full of quality. For REALS!!! Pathetic.

*Shopping at costco feels so decadent. No, one really doesn’t need 40 lbs of chicken salad, but boy-howdy it’s only $12. How can I resist?? Brilliant!

*Saw “Slumdog Millionaire”. Holy crap. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen something so movingly, aching, painfully beautiful. I gasped, felt my stomach lurch, cried, laughed, and wanted to take home everyone in this movie. No words can sum up how much I loved this movie. Can’t wait to see it again. Beautiful. In another life I’d like to come back as Frieda Pinto—stunning.

Happy birthday Sara (again, and late)! :))

QUICK: jan. 19-25

******ALL ABOUT OBAMA!! *******
I watched the inauguration on the web at work—oops! SOOOO many emotions—awe, pride, happiness, fear, nervousness, but most of all teary! To see such a smart and capable man take over after 8 miserable years of destructive and embarrassing nonsense was such a RELIEF! My faith in my country was restored.

And then…..

*I saw FB “friends” post their fears and complaints about Obama. Can you “unfriend” based soley on political views?!? I admit, reading those comments made me unexpectedly MAD. I honestly couldn’t believe there were people out there who could see this so completely differently. They even MISSED BUSH!! Unreal and distressing. Naturally, these people are living in Texas and couldn’t wait for him to return “home”—whatever, they can HAVE his idiotic ass. WANT TO PUKE WITH FRUSTRATION!

*Even more pukeworthy: CARROT CAKE!
I rarely bake. I fear all things that call for flour. Baking is precise and scientific and I’m enthusiastically half-assed. Now, the reason why I even made a cake speaks to my half-assedness. I have no concept of weights and measures (hense, I weigh more than the woman who was pregnant with 8 babies). I wanted to order carrots from the grocery store (James does all his shopping online, I occasionally add to his list), but the little pictures don’t tell you much about scale. I thought the 1 pound bag of carrots sounded kinda light, as did the 2 pound bag, so I went for the 5 pound bag of carrots. HOLY S#$%!!! I had more carrots than I knew what to do with! I roasted them, I candied them, I ate them with hummus and peanut butter….and STILL had a bag-load! So, I broke down and attempted the carrot cake recipe my mom has been using all my life (it’s my dad’s favorite, so she makes it every xmas for his bday). The cake (despite my fears) came out great…maybe a little too moist (I didn’t completely drain the pineapple), but the M-Fing ICING! Ugh!! Let’s see, it calls for powdered sugar, butter, cream cheese and vanilla. How exactly does that end up tasting like m-fing POISON?!?! It was bitter as all hell, but the husband swore it was good. He’s really too sweet sometimes. I knew that s*** was forked up!! I hate baking. SO frustrating. I can’t ever seem to get it all to work. I’ll leave it to Betty Crocker next time.

*Shopping Spree
Something came over me and I became a shopping fool. It’s all those ‘sale’ signs that did me in! Granted, nothing was expensive or luxurious, it just all adds up! Here’s the rundown of what I did in 1 afternoon:
-Spices at Penzey’s: so fun. I love that Martha Stewart and I shop at the same spice store. I rule!
-A couple of cheap-ass sweaters at TJ Maxx. I love that it’s known as TJ Mex in more Hispanic-heavy areas of town. ;)
-Another bottle of that L’Occitane stuff I love so much, plus a couple of other things….only had to spend $50 for the FREE TOTEBAG!! Ugh. I’m such a sucka.
-Tops at TALBOT’S. WTF?!?! Who the hell am I--a sorority lady?! But they were cute and cheap, just my style.
-Even MORE stuff at Bath and Body. That sale just doesn’t stop!
-Walmart. I’m a total hypocrite. I hate all that is Walmart, but I end up there more than I’d like. I went in to get a tub of cream cheese icing and a bottle of vanilla (for the damn cake—above), but ended up with $50 worth of CRAP! Stoopid!
-A new fancy hot iron to make my hair suri-straight. My old iron bit the dust after many years, so it was a little sad to have to say goodbye.

I think I’m done shopping for a while. I’ve got to get my s*** straight!
help!

quick quick

For the week of 1/12-1/18:
****MENTAL BREAKDOWN! Not only was I premenstrual, I was also suffering from Lexapro withdrawl! My doctor took about a week to verify my refill, so I was dying ova hea! I felt dizzy, lightheaded, confused, on the verge of passing out and GROUCHY! Poor James spent most of the week saying “what is WRONG with you?” and “why are you freaking out about THAT?!”…which is like fuel to the mental instability fire…which means…accelerated anger (the not-so-fun-sister product to accelerated math—HA! RCS humor!). FYI, I finally got my meds, Fred came to visit, so things are looking up.

*Perhaps because of my mental state, I had a lot of energy. I found myself going to kickboxing almost every night of the week (only missed 2 nites—when it wasn’t offered). I know I need to mix up my workouts, but kickboxing is FUN!

*High winds: we’ve had beautiful weather for almost 2 weeks now—gorgeous sunny skies, clear nights, and WIND! Holy crap! I love me some winds (growing up on the coast has made me a wind-lover), but these winds were cah-raaaaazy! Gusts up to the 50 mph, trees falling down, roofs blowing off… Thankfully the only damage we suffered was my barbeque cover blowing away (never to be seen again) and my windchimes breaking.

*Sunday, I had a friend come over to do some “speed scrapping”—just cut, paste, and GO. No embellishing or journaling, just giterdone. I wasn’t able to take that approach, but I at least started on my wedding album. I forget how fun scrapping is, but I just wish I could drag out allllll my stuff and spread it out. It’s all packed away in little spots so I forget what I have. I want a craft room where I can do my mess. Real estate is just nuts in town, STILL! Sheesh! That’s a topic for another time….

Peace OUT!

stitch bitch

ha HA! I did it! I used my new sewing machine that i got for xmas! I downloaded a simple pattern for a sewing machine cover, bought some pretty fabric, and in no time had a darling cover! The hardest part was threading the machine and SEWING ON THE FEATHER TRIM!! It was perfect until the damn trim. Whatever.

Here it is: black and white on front/back; black on top; yellow with white polka dot seersucker on sides.

The little pockets hold small 'notions'. FUN! (fyi, the buttons are decorative, they don't actually button. that's WAAAAY down the road).

yippee!!

quick, quick!

I think i'll just jot down small random things that came up last week (1/5-1/11). Maybe easier than trying to think of an entire story or something. I'm all about quick and easy!

*Facebook addiction: omg. how did i let this happen?? i swear, i must go on there like 100 times a day. i'm totally addicted....which leads to...

*Flashbacks to high school: between FB and my new "do" (see below), all those awkward, inadequate feelings from high school have been flooding over me lately. in fact, the other night i had a dream where i was in a very narrow stairwell in my high school and i was literally being trampled by people from my school. Um. I'm no Freud, but I think there's something there.

*My new do: i was expecting a trim and ended up with something both wonderful and horrific. When it's straight I feel terribly chic and suri-cruise-like. When it's curly, i feel like i need to break out my doc martins, flannel shirt and Wine With Everything lipstick. it's like my head went right back to 1992... with the addition of crow's feet, bright and shiny grey hairs and forehead wrinkles.

*I'm bummed that one of my favorite co-workers, myra, has gone on to greener (and I DO MEAN GREEEEEN...as in MOOLAH!!) pastures. She is so funny and smart and wise and fun. I miss her already.

*I GOT AN IPHONE!!! I've been wanting one for a few months and used some xmas cash to get it. I still think it's just a dang phone, but people keep telling me it will change my life. I guess it has, seeing how all i use it for is to check FB and twitter.

*I bought 9 bottles of wine at costco the other day. Each bottle was under $10, but when you're at the martinez-owen household it's all about quantity, not quality. I love seeing my list of items at the checkout: 9 bottles of wine, toilet paper, and a giant bag of Kettle Chips. Homegirl must be stocking up for something VILE!

*Went to see The Reader. I wanna a booty like Kate Winslet's.

*Went to the Bath and Body Works sale 3 times in 4 days. Each time I went to pick up something specific and ended up with something totally different. I just gave up at the end. Anyone need body creme? Ooo! I got one that I think Steph will like! Heads up, I'll send it your way, girl!

* After Sara mentioned it, I got the Japanese eyelash Fiber mascara stuff from Sephora. Save your $. Sara, I was gonna try it out before giving it to you for your bday. It SUCKS. Pros: doesn't smudge and only comes off with water. CONS: doesn't lengthen or fatten your lashes, feels weird when it comes off (like slimy grime), and costs $20+. Also sucky: Benefit Bad Gal Lash. Smudgy, makes my eyes water and messy to apply. So far, nothing's better than my Queen Latifah Cover Girl whatever.

*I started the application online for a graduate program for Multicultural Early Intervention. Hopefully this will put me in a position to be able to seek greener pastures in the future, too!!

*This was my ovulation week and we had the mom-in-law visiting. James didn't feel romantic with his mama 12 feet away in our tiny house, or he was tired, blah blah blah. Thank goodness we're BOTH apathetic about this baby-making thing! ;)

peace OUT!