feelin low....

(this is, admittedly, a pathetic and pity-party-post. sorry!! it'll pass, but i thought i'd share for a moment)

So after another visit from FRED, I suddenly had a realization this morning as i was brushing my teeth while reading a scrapbooking magazine....WTF am i scrapping for?? I guess in the back of my mind i always figured someone would be interested in seeing my stupid scrapbook pages...and i guess i always assumed that would be someone related to me (as in, a kid)... But what if i don't ever have kids? who are these scrapbooks for?!?!? who's going to give a crap about that one time we went to vancouver for 4th of july? me? in my senility?? i reckon that's what i need to remember. i'm doing it for myself. it's just weird how these sad feelings of 'who really cares' pop up every now and then. about 98% of the time i feel very happy with my life and how it's going. just...once in a while i feel like i'm living my life in a holding pattern...like i'm waiting for the next big thing to come....but....this might be it...and 98% of the time, that's totally great! just....when i look at the stuff i need to scrapbook i wonder....who (besides me) will ever care?!?!?

if i had some lime, i'd make me a gin and tonic....

off to scrap some more.....sigh...

Beautiful Weekend

OMG, we had the world's most perfect weather this weekend. Low 70s, cool breeze, flowers blooming, sun shining, mountains glowing with winter snow....just glorious. Makes me happy to be alive. Ahhhhh..... Sadly, no pictures to document the beauty. Just take my word for it.

Saturday we ran errands after having a picnic at the rose garden. Did i mention the weather was perfect?!?! The roses weren't really blooming yet, but it's still such a beautiful place.
As luck would have it, my perfect picnic was marred by a damn squirrel.

After a squirrel had the NERVE to climb up the back of my leg to get to my cookie (the baked good in my hand, not my...you know, "cookie") in college i've had a massive thing against f-ing squirrels. Anyhoo, we were sitting in the shady picnic area with a beautiful view of downtown and Mount Hood in the background, enjoying our sandwiches and stuff. I'd pointed out the big, fat squirrel earlier, "is it pregnant?" "how embarrassing if it's not pregnant and we think it is", etc. So, I'm gazing at the view, enjoying the breezes and I hear James say "WHOA! Look at that!" I look to my left and to my right, but don't see anything weird. THEN, I look straight ahead. Right there not 18 inches away from me is THE DAMN SQUIRREL sitting right on the picnic table staring straight at me with its little beady pregnant eyes. EWWW! It took a second or 2 for me to process what I was looking at, then I let out the most girlish, cartoon-y hoot/scream and began kicking my feet and throwing my hands all around. The damn thing just SAT there until finally it saw James wave his arm. I was totally creeped out. Honestly, my voice was ridiculously girly: like the lady in the Tom and Jerry cartoons when she sees Jerry and hops on the chair and screams. So embarrassing. I'm a grown-assed woman afraid of a damn SQUIRREL!!! Stupid.

The rest of the day was WAY better, with the exception of seeing "Terminator Salvation". I was so hyped (love me some Christian Bale and stupid explosions)!! It was such a disappointment! So much potential. Sigh.

At least So You Think You Can Dance is back on.

OH!! I never watch those horrible Jon and Kate people but was terribly curious to see how they'd handle the cheating allegations, etc. this season. It was really bad. Like watching a divorce slowly unfold. I felt dirty. Can't say I won't watch again, though.

How was YOUR weekend???

father cutie!

OMG! I vaguely heard something about the Catholic priest who'd been caught having an affair... with a woman (phew!!! what a relief!), but didn't really get into the story much. Like many modern-day Catholics who feel like the Church needs to revamp some of the more...restrictive positions (birth control! homosexuality! priests' celibacy! etc!), I figured, "oh, poor dear. he should be able to have a romantic relationship AND continue to perform his role as a priest" blahblahblah. Didn't really give it much thought.

WELL. FINALLY, I saw a picture of the dude.

HOLY CRAP!!!

This guy is H.O.T. Not just attractive or handsome, but HOOOOOOTTTT!!!!

AND his name is Father Cutie??? Too adorable. Granted, you don't pronounce it that way, but come on. CUTIE?!?!?! Too much.

I think I'm in love. Let's move on this whole letting priests have "relationships" already. I'm first in line, yo!

actor's studio questionnaire

1. What is your favorite word? chocolatey
2. What is your least favorite word? ****roach
3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally? Eww. I reckon 'sincerity'
4. What turns you off? narcissism
5. What is your favorite curse word? f**k
6. What sound or noise do you love? the ocean
7. What sound or noise do you hate? shopping cart on asphalt
8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt? soap opera actress
9. What profession would you not like to do? anything in finance/accounting/budgets/related to $$
10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates? you're home

Your turn! If those asshole actors can do it, so can we!

There once was a very crooked girl

OMG. Talk about the dumbest injury!

Evidently, I have the world’s strongest neck muscles. Strong enough to torque my neck to such a degree, I’m walking around with my ear on my right shoulder like a dog listening to a confusing sound. I woke up early for an 8am meeting at work (ugghhh!!!), did a little stretch as I got out of bed and simultaneously heard a pop and felt a shooting pain down the left side of my neck. Every movement hurt like the dickens. I was convinced I’d ruptured my jugular vein and was about to die of massive internal bleeding….so I showered really fast. I called my doctor and was ready and waiting in her office as they opened at 8am. She wanted me to get some xrays (SEE?!?!? I knew it was serious!!) and take some muscle relaxants (oh yes, PLEASE!) and not go in to work.

I called work to let them know I wouldn’t be in (oops, had to miss my day-long meeting. What a chame.), took my medicine and slept for 4 hours. I woke up, called my doctor to see what horrible thing I’d done to my vertebrae (nothing, it’s just a muscle spasm), took another pill and slept for another 4 hours.

THE PAIN, y’all, the PAIN! I was tempted to self-medicate with some leftover oxycotin, but decided Advil was smarter and less habit-forming. Now, 2 days later, the pain is less intense, but moving down my neck to my shoulders. I’m sure it’s all because of my desk job. Sitting hunched over for hours at a time can’t be good.

It all comes back to my ultra-strong neck muscles. I had no idea how dangerous they were—to be able to stretch out and strain itself. WOW! Shoulda guessed, though. Every time I do crunches or ab exercises at the gym, my NECK is what’s sore the next day. Clearly I’m doing something wrong if my neck is getting the massive workout meant for my gut! Just don’t mess with my neck or else it’ll kick your ASS!!!