UNINTENTIONAL Hoof in Mouth...a downer

ok, so shouting bigoted, uneducated, terribly tasteless comments from my inner-most id has gotten me in trouble plenty of times.
Sadly, my considerable talents in deducing others' most sensitive and painful topics continues. These accidental and completely ignorant outbursts bother me more than any 'hair on your balls' or 'no way, jew' ever will.
i guess i should have more awareness that the women i associate with are often of child-bearing age and with that comes a need to be evermore delicate. not my strong suit.
example number 1: a few months ago my husband's friends were staying with us. they had photos and copious notes about their cat's new litter of kittens. the wife, a complete doll named jenny, is a pediatric nurse and took her job as surrogate co-mommy very very seriously. each kitten had it's every meal, bm and nap lovingly documented...for weeks. after about an hour and a half of listening to her devotion i blurted out, 'jenny, you need to just hurry up and have kids, already!' ha...freakin....ha. she blushed and just muttered something like, 'yeah....anyway, so here's a picture of "fatty" smothering her brothers' or something. as james and i were getting ready to go to sleep, i remarked at jenny's obvious baby fever and james informed me that they HAD been trying for some time to conceive and after months of frustration they'd decided to relocate across the country so jenny's husband john could take a job where invitro fertilization was covered by insurance. holy crap!!!!! i had no idea! this little tidbit could have saved me and poor jenny a lot of embarassment and pain! he coulda/shoulda mentioned it!!!!! he's clueless.

example number 2: last night (oh yes, it's so fresh i can still taste the tang of shame)i was with some colleages out in the boise metro area. i mentioned that one of my friends had decided the financial hardships of attempting IVF were beyond their means. i went on to blurt (love me some blurting) that it was more common than not that women i knew had trouble conceiving...blah, blah, blah. Well, come to find out (after 2 bottles of wine poolside at the holiday inn) that one of my colleauges had miscarried at 14 weeks and this week would have been her due date. OOOOOOOOUUUUUUCCCCCCHHHHHH!!!! between that and the red wine headache, i couldn't sleep. i kept replaying everything i'd said during our trip about babies. poor girl!!!

i wish i could say that i vow to never blurt out anything that could be painful, but i can't. if only i could use my uncanny talents at intuiting pain for good and not evil.
:(
feeling sad and very very insensitive.

could be worse. i coulda gone on a racist tirade about Katrina-victims over a huge family thanksgiving dinner like my aunt. guess loose tongues and bad judgment run in our family.